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Thursday, July 31, 2014

Writing to narrate

We are learning to write a good narrative. We learned about five elements which make a story more exciting; plot, character, setting, conflict and theme. 

We wanted to write about an alien visiting Earth. 
First we planned our story using a hamburger planning sheet. 

Here are some of our stories: 

Once an alien visited Earth. His name was Jayton. Jayton’s space ship crashed. He wanted to make friends with people. People thought that he was scary and dangerous. I thought he was nice. He crashed into a power line. He wanted someone to fix his space ship. I helped him fix his space ship. He gave me a ride in his flying saucer. I went home. By then he was gone.
By Tristan.

 I looked out the window. A little alien ship crashed into my house. I need to fix it. The alien had yellow eyes and its body is green.
He said, “I’m going to take over the world.”
He was in the space ship and went to town taking over the world. I shot him dead but I saw six space ships of aliens. “Oh no,” I thought.
They crashed into a tree. “I have just five guns.” Then I shot five of them. There was one more. Then I cut him. He was dead. I saved the world.
By Raukura

One day Wobble the alien crashed his space ship on Earth. I was excited. I went running outside shouting, “Wobble!”
I said, “Are you alright?”
He said, “Yes, but you are going to have to help me fix my space ship.”
It took all day. He grumbled. He said, “I am so hungry.”
I said, “I will get you something to eat.”
He said, “Yes please. I want a banana.”
“Ok.” I went inside and got one. When I came out I was inside. I looked at the walls. They shook. We went around all of the planets. Then we came home. I said goodbye and then went home.
By Quinn

On Friday an alien named Freddy was cruising in his space saucer. Suddenly a meteor hit his saucer and sent him shooting to Earth. He crash landed in a tree when I was walking in the organic gardens. He jumped out at me. I could not believe my eyes. He had razor sharp claws and five blade looking t-t-t-teeth. There we met Max. Max screamed when he saw the alien. Then Max came back with a burger. He calmed down and made friends with the alien. When we got back to the saucer there were evil aliens. They were killing people with cannons and missiles. Max shouted and the aliens stopped. The master came up to Max and said,
“You are not very nice.”
Then Max saw Scott. Scott built a machine and shrunk the aliens. Suddenly they grew bigger and bigger. Then an alien got Mrs Arnott. Mrs Arnott was smacking an alien with a frying pan. Then the aliens ate Mrs Arnott. I said, “Stop it!” Then we all saw Mrs Coleman. She was looking cool. Her hair was red and she had long nails. She got rid of the aliens with magic. Poor Mrs Arnott was still in the alien’s tummy. Then we all went home.
By Finlay

One day some aliens came to Earth and they crashed their space ship. My family, my friends and I helped them fix it. First we said, “Will you destroy our land?” They said, “No,” so we helped them and we played together. It was so fun. Then they said, “We better go.” So they went. We all went back to the space station. We all walked into the space station, we talked all about it. We were wondering if they were going to come back, or if bad ones were coming. I was so, so scared. There were more aliens. They had red eyes as red as blood. They had two fingers and on the end of their fingers they had super long and sharp claws. I was so scared that I screamed. I was going to run into the space station. The aliens all came and they flew away. It was so fast I could hardly see it. It was just white flames. My heart was still pumping so fast. I was so glad that they were gone. I went back to my job and I was hoping that they weren’t going to come back and the nice ones were going to come back. But no aliens came all week. I was so happy that they were gone. It was so quiet I would not stop working on my job. Then someone said, “I think we should have a day off.” So that day we played ball. We had so much fun.
By Kaya